Demonstrations

by LLYDIAN

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1.
02:51
I'm going to go to California I'm going to drive along the coast I'm going to climb a redwood and see a gold town ghost I'm going to leave behind my home and leave behind my kin change my name and cut my hair and never come back again It's the lure of the shining cities it's the lure of the sunny skies the belief that I'll be different if I escape my current life it's probably a fantasy, it's certainly a lie-- but when I go to California I'm going to leave myself behind. I'm going-- I'm gone! Can't you see me packing up all of my boxes? My car running with the headlights on? I keep trying to write the perfect song about why I want to go the longing in my psyche for sand between my toes oh, I don't even know why (or I can't quite articulate) but I'm going to California and it will never be too late.
2.
04:08
Dandelion, dandelion Young, yellow and green Go, overrun the lawn, Nod your heads in the breeze. Dandelion, dandelion You are not a weed I planted you myself one morning Quite intentionally My darlings, I will tend to you My darlings, you will grow The fairest blossoms in my yard And everyone will know Dandelion, dandelion Blow away the seeds Blow out candles on a cake Like the wind blows away the leaves Dandelion, dandelion The seeds fly across the earth Candle smoke rises up, going past The leaves rushing downwards My darlings, I will send you out, As I was never sent And promise this place will always Be a home where you can rest So when you go into the wide, wide world And people try to mow you down Just remember where you grew And remember who loves you And remember who is so very proud.
3.
05:00
Red wine looks like blood I spilled on the carpet You started the flood I saw what I should not When I saw you first I loved all the wrong things The water is cursed And now I am drowning I went to go see if the stories were true and they were there in the room All battered and broken, with bruise upon bruise Yes, they were there in the room No brothers to come and no sisters to call No keys fit the shackles I see on these walls The stain leaches out from the room to the hall No keys fit the shackles I see on these walls I bleed with the moon You drink with the sunrise You're killing me soon No one will be surprised.
4.
03:56
you told me not to worry but I think you did you started throwing money around like a big man in a film well, if you aren't the father I think I know who is. I'm not sure if I love you, but I sure as hell don't trust him when I told you in your kitchen I knew that I would be forever in your perception just a vessel full of need I'm lucky you're a good man-- I'm grateful, but it stings to be nothing but fertile ground on which you rain generosity please don't ask more questions don't look me in the eye just take me to the courthouse I'll sign what they say to sign and I'll swear to be true if you swear to be kind. it's a heavy sort of favor when the balance is a life.
5.
03:07
I mustn't write a love song for you'll think it's about you and it isn't about you though I may draw inspiration If I wrote about "his" eyes-- so deeply blue they hurt-- they wouldn't be your eyes! ...though they may share certain features. (I hope you do not mind) I mustn't write a love song for I'm not in love with you. And I'm not in love with you! It's just a foolish fascination... If I wrote about "his" hands-- so warm against my own-- they wouldn't be your hands, though oh! they are well-formed! (so you see, I'm in a bind) This could never be a love song for nothing in it is true. For if it were ever true, I would break in desperation! If I wrote about your walk, about your hands, about your face it'd show how deeply I am lost-- no, no, it must just be a turn of phrase! For you don't respond in kind... so, you see, I'm in a bind.
6.
04:19
Do you remember? It was almost winter, and I would walk down the hill from my job. Walk home every weekend and think of what happened and oh! I'd wish to God that it had not. You told me you loved me, and I told you the truth: That faith is not fact and that hope is not proof. Those walks were my solace all that lonely autumn-- the color of the trees against the sky-- thinking back to the summer; you were trying to come closer but I was only trying to walk by You told me you loved me and I told you the truth: That faith is not fact and that hope is not proof. If signals were sent, I apologize. They were inadvertent, and my eyes, they were blind! I am walking down that hill, I don't think until now I knew what it meant to tell someone you love them, on a cloudy fall morning, and to know that they'll never love you back. He told me the same things that I told to you: That faith is not fact and that hope is not proof. We knock on those doors and we ask to receive But no one can give when they do not believe.
7.
03:17
You may lose interest in me You may forget the pull I held You may begin to think of me as indifferently as a book upon a shelf that you've read a million times, every word on every page. But! You didn't comprehend the last words were not "The End," And part two is on it's way... You may lose interest in "us." You may forget the word exists. When we have come down from the snowy heights and a sedentary life seems pure lazy bliss. Well, I know we need ordinary things, as well as all these highs and lows, embrace this chance for us to breathe, and then come and climb with me onwards from this flat plateau. You may think that this show is done or that the curtain's going down-- but we have years left in this run, Baby, we're just warming up! You simply can't back down right now! When the best is yet to come-- and babe, won't it be sweet? You can always just ad-lib, this play is not a one-girl gig, don't leave! When the best is yet to come-- I won't lose you so easily! It may seems tedious right now, but baby, stick around and I'll make it interesting!
8.
03:49
I could have touched you if I chose, you were so close, looking over in my direction to suss out which way the wind blows-- when it tugs at our clothes-- a voluntary hesitation. Well, you read the signs of my downcast eyes, my shaking head-- and I'm glad you did. Say nothing! I could have loved you if I chose, but I was too close, too tight-fisted in my affections. Thinking that it would save us both, (if you would just go) unnecessary desolation. And I thought myself wise! Perhaps in time, no more regrets, no more "I wish I had..." I wish I had not thought myself so wise, for I was not right! And here's regret, here is: "I wish I had said something."
9.
If you must send me, dear, away, at least take me yourself! Set me safe in some distant place where I can't even run for help If you must send me, dear, so far, take me to the lonely hills I want nobody next to me if I can't have you there as well. But you say I'm just a distraction and that my proximity completely wrecks concentration-- well, I don't know why that should be! But, if you must send me, dear, from you, at least kiss me goodbye-- And if you see it's hard to leave, well, stay with me, if you like--- stay with me all my life!

about

(note from Lauren in 2019) My solo project is now going under the name LLYDIAN (ep coming June 2019), but before LLYDIAN was even a twinkle in my eye, I made this record. I put a tremendous amount of work into it, and am still proud of this little DIY-100%-done-on-GarageBand record. If you've listened, thank you.

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You can download this for free (or pay-what-you-will), here, and at:
www.soundcloud.com/laurenoglesby

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Lauren Oglesby: Vocals, guitars, keys, glockenspiel, kazoo, and percussion on all tracks.

Melanie Wong: Violin on "Bluebeard," "Interest," and "Say Nothing."

Ruth Bryan & Melanie Wong: vocals on "If You Must Send Me, Dear, Away."

Erin Miley: vocal recording & editing on "Fremont," "Say Nothing," "Bluebeard," and "Interest."

Casey Lembke: graphic design

All songs © Lauren Oglesby 2014

credits

released April 23, 2014

Thanks to Melanie (bamf extreme!), Ruth (long roads & late nights), and Erin (o generous soul); Seth (lender of glockenspiels), Clark (giver of old floor toms), Casey (space penguin extraordinaire), Amy and Rob (your house is where many of these recordings began), Mom and Dad (your house is where many of these were completed), and Adrianne, Emma and Bekah (just because).

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LLYDIAN New Orleans, Louisiana

LLYDIAN is a new project from singer-songwriter Lauren Oglesby (The Light Set). Debut EP Interiors released on June 25th.

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